THankful thursday!!

I have a lot to be thankful for...

they come in little sizes and bigger sizes...

but they are mine and I know how blessed I truly am!

Wordless Wednesday...

Miss Delaney

I love this youngest daughter of mine!!

My gentle Reminder

We all have our good days and sometimes, especially lately,

it seems as if I have been having a lot of challenging days.  That is a good word for it.

From chronic back pain to a flat tire to a chipped tooth...to our water softener dying and 

drowning our basement to the nice tune of thousands of dollars.

It has been daily moments of "what...now this?"  

But even though these not so fun things happen I know it could be much worse.

All I need to do is walk my not so positive attitude up the driveway and stand on top and look forward.

Forward to the beauty that is right in front of me...that God has created and the beauty

that is so natural, pure, and gives me peace and the reminder that things are okay.

The checkbook will be okay, our soggy basement will be okay, and my mental status too

will all be OKAY!!  

So I take this lil walk frequently and this time I happen to bring my camera with just so I could share

the view I have to remind me that I am blessed.  What view do you have?   Care to

share?

Thankful Thursday!

Wordless Wednesday

thankful thursday....

Mom and Dad....they mean the world to me and it is very difficult to watch them age.

Wordless Wednesday!

Toes

I just never seem to get tired of looking at these 10 perfect toes!!

Wordless Wednesday....

Elliott....that was some pig.

 Julia loves Eliott....this was her pride and joy for the summer of 2011!!  He was the pig that her dad and her traveled almost 300 miles to Iowa to get him..she loved him and with the help and guidance of the breeder she raised him, fed him, and bathed him twice daily.  He had his own special sleeping area with special bedding and own special feed show with special rations and had his own beauty parlor where Julia bathed, lotioned him up and kept a fan on him daily!!  He was loved!

 So when he did so well at State Fair and made it into the purple ribbon auction...it was well earned and deserved but most of all....it was Julia's 4~H career dream....accomplished in her summer of her sophmore year!  What awe we were all in!!  We were truly speechless!   It kept us down there one more day but so worth the time and being a part of this special recognition of many young animal lovers who have done well.

 We helped set up...we listened and learned...and admired...

 But Elliott was the true show that nite...we were proud of Julia

and proud of this pig who loved Julia back.

Tears were shed by her as she had to say goodbye to him the

next day.   She cried even on Monday once she was home...

she missed the cute thing.  Even the mom kinda missed the guy!

But it was this once in a lifetime experience that we all...got to be a part of

is what I am thankful for and to be so proud of her and how her dedication to that 

muddy little thing could go soo far!!   Way to go Julia!!

I feel for this boy..

He is a thinker....

He has tough days....dealing with things in life...

But I truly believe all he wants is love and give love.

Checkin' it out..

Miss Delaney can't miss a thing. After all its fair time!!

Sisters....

They can be all dolled up...ready to go out...

Or....they can be silly and laugh, giggle and carry on as if they are still toddlers!!

and then they can be there so settle each others' nerves...and help one do the others hair..

and then they can just "be"....be close and friend to one another.

Grandpa's hands....

Silly or what?

Mathias, Marcus and Grant having some plain old fun!!

Mathias moments!

Having some time to think while at the county fair!   He is special to me!

CoUsInS!!

Brooklyn and Grant....saying Goodbye at the fair!  Cousins are special!

simple things...

These 10 toes...2 feet are dear to me.

They belong to Miss Delaney.

The pitter patter of them make my heart smile.

What makes you smile?

Farm life and its' lessons

Boy has it been a tough week on the farm.

Dealing with death is difficult..especially for the little ones that just quite can't understand

why things have to let life go.

We have had 2 calves die due to dehydration and illness and 2 kittens killed

by and unknown source.

Can I tell you that it was one of the most emotionally draining week I have had in quite some time.  The 2nd calf was Mathias'.   Him and I together were going to raise this calf.

A project to call our own.  We had named him Clyde.

We bottle fed him twice a day...walked him numerous time with the halter...scratched his neck...talked to him and simply showed our love.

Mathias was proud of his calf and the ease in which he could do his chores each day.

To tell him that Clyde was not strong enough and had died due to illness and heat...was the hardest thing and to see your child overcome with such sadness and grief that it consumed him to the point of almost a fetal position broke me ....it just tore me up.

But with hugs...talking...sharing stories...each day is getting a bit better.

But now there is that fear....fear of if it could happen again if we venture into another calf.

Fear and loss makes us call upon our faith.  Faith was my word I chose for 2011. 

It is truly been one I have had to focus on.

Faith will get us through...and faith will allow us to move on and pull ourselves up and take another step forward.  With my kids hand in mine...we will step forward.

This farm life is tough...happy...sad all mixed together.

It is teaching the kids lessons right along with Doug and I.

Life is a gift...given to us!  A reminder that this life we have should never be taken for granted.

I am still sad...but I have my FAITH!!

Grant.....

 It was 4 year ago today that Grant Micheal entered our lives!!  It was fair week....the busiest week of the year and he made his debut!!

Induced due to high amount of amniotic fluid...which I feel lucky he is fine because he had a triple nuchal chord around his neck...first one was so tight it had to be cut.  But he came out a crying and weighed in at 8 pounds 3 ounces!!  

He was another blonde and big blue eyes.

He has brought so much joy and smiles to our lives.   He loves to giggle....run...play tractors...and run and give you a daily hug softly around your leg.   He rarely causes trouble.

He loves his brothers and his baby sister. He is our only blonde.

He is my 4th son and 6th born.

Life is better with him in it.

We love him and hope that his birthday is special to him as much as he is special to us!!

Happy Birthday G!!   We love you so!

Together....

Family....it is what is all about!!

Fatigue....

This little lady doesn't stop moving very often....

but when she does....it means she is 

really tired.

Must have been a busy day for her.

Do you ever wonder....

what a moment means to someone so little? Such a small glimpse of time caught, yet to him it may be such a big memory!

Because to catch such a moment in this little man...where there is no talking...makes me wonder just what has him quiet. What is going through this little mans mind...I can only imagine big things!

Mathias is the winner!

Mathias and his big catch of the day!!

Cuz when you are gonna catch the big one of the day...ya gotta be prepared!

Melting....

How can I just not melt at that smile?

I do have a wonderful Grant!!

My Grant and his baby blues...and the strong, calm hands of his 
brother...James!

Summertime.....

Grant....splishin' and a splashin'...and a smilin'!

Marcus....muddin it!!

Loving the water....but keeping an eye on the shore.

The boys having fun with the Huemann boys!

But the girls....they be soakin' up the rays!!

Thankful Tuesday!!

The little boys and their love for their daddy!

My supersweet and his calmness....

James and his desire to be daring!!

Mathias and his constant interest in new things...or bettering his skills on the old things!!

And it finally came to a head....

It wasn't a nice day here at the Holen house.

It was one of those days you knew it was brewing just waiting to come to a boil...

I despise conflict...always have.   I am the peace maker...always have done that as well.

So when kids start fighting and backtalking....then the not so go with the flow mom is not so nice.

I have always been okay with an occasional xbox time through out the years...

but these games now are addictive, make sibling fight, change the demeanor that they typically have...and my sons are prime examples.

So after multiple warning shots for a timeout from the xbox....things elevated.  Boys simply defied me, yelled at me, and even through things at me.

So...the xbox is now packed up and officially no longer a part of the Holen house.

I tried to stay calm as the loudness got louder of an angry 12 year old...but he finally got the smarts to take a walk and cool down.

A long private discussion took place when the Dad came home.  And for the first time in a long time we had an enjoyable evening.

Mathias has started medicated for his behavioral issues ...which is a whole other subject. I feel guilty as a mom for letting it go on as long as it did...he can't help it and there is help out there.  We are in week 2 of therapy and he is a different boy.   

This summer has had some lessons to be learned.   After hearing a close uncle has cancer it makes one look at life differently.  We hope that our messages sink into our kids so they get the point that all the material things in the world won't make you happy....it is what is inside and family that counts!!

i hope our explosive days are gone.  The pleaser in me soo wanted to give in to his whining and yellling...but i didn't.

Perhaps I am stronger than I think I am!!

~~~~Grace~~~~

I want you to face the mountain

so that you can see,

when the mountain is out of the way

all there is left is Me.

Only I can move the mountain,

only I can push it away,

only I can conquer the problems

that you face today.

Your only job is to believe, to listen to My voice,

and when you hear what I command,

obedience is your choice.

But I will not make it too difficult for the victory

is already Mine,

and I will fill you with My Spirit and through 

you My grace will shine.

Not when you are perfect,

like you think you need to be,

but when your heart is willing to become more

and more like Me.

~~~unknown~~~

Goofy times....

I love seeing my daughters act silly.  I came across this pic from our annual Itasca state park

vacation from last summer!

They are pals...they laugh..they giggle..

they have their own silly language at times.

It warms my heart to know that they stick together because they choose to

and not because they HAVE to!!

They are special to me

and special to each other!

"What the rush?"

So every morning before the kiddos arise I try and take 10 minutes or so to read my devotion

for the day.

This morning it was what is the rush?

Boy isn't it true....we rush and hurry from one thing to the next each day and before we 

know it the day is a blur and its over.

So this devotion spoke about being able to slow down and find time to enjoy each

moment through out our days.

It is funny that this devotion came today because last night just before Doug and I went to bed we commented on how much we got done outside for the day...which was fathers day..and how fast it went.   But I was pleased to say that we did  stop several times and 

just ENJOY the moments with the kids or the breeze and the shade.   

We love being at home...we had kids running around being kids...and at one point we were

all just sitting on the deck talking and laughing as the father of all these kids looked

upon us with a smile...(he didn't know I was watching him)

We stopped and sat in the garden and ate some yummy strawberries...we stopped and stood in the shade and enjoyed the soft breeze and beautiful scenery of our farm.

It was a good day...although I have to say not all of our days we do this but I always

get a kick out of how these devotions come just at the right time.

That is truly the Lord speaking to me and reminding me that I have things to work on and need to enjoy what I have.   Gentle whispers that I have to be open to receive.

"To everything there is a season, and a time for every matter or purpose under heaven."

----Ecclesiastes 3:1-----

Its been awhile....

I can't believe its been so long since I have posted a lil something.

Things have been rather chaotic since school out. 

Bedtime has now moved from 830pm to no 1030 if we are lucky.

Kids are already fighting daily...saying "we are bored" and "we never get to do anything."

Sometimes those words flow in one ear and out the next...and somedays theose words make me sad..mad...whatever.

Its hard for me because i am such a people pleaser that i want everyone to be happy....but in a household of 9 that just isn't possible.

I have to learn to accept that.

"give me that...wahhh"..."I had that first...wahhh"...chasing...wrestling...its all so overwhelming!!

I have been finding that including them though in my daily walking bouts that it seems to help get rid of some their energy.   I lately have been saying the younger ones are like puppies....if you exercise them so they are tired...they don't have time to be naughty or fighting.

As we speak....fighting over the door knob....seriously?????

I try to let them solve their own most of the time otherwise I would be a referee 24 hours a day!

but at the days end....I have 7 blessing...that my give me 7 headaches a day...but I wouldn't have it any other way!!